GOTTA SEE IT TO BELIEVE IT...

After talking about the flea market during our Friday night Bike N' Booze, we decided to check it out yesterday. We visited a very sleepy and kinda hung over Lee at work at Dazbog coffee in my neighborhood for a cup of joe and some food. Then Danyel, Zach, Brandon and I headed out to the Mile High Flea Market, and as the website says "... it's Colorado's largest flea market and is something you have to see to believe." Truer words have never been spoken. Below are some photos from our little field trip. Enjoy.

This was the first person we ran into. Hot damn... there is just something about a woman in flannel, with the masculine hands of a coal miner, unfiltered cigarettes and a butchy mullet that gets me going. Sorry Chelsea.


Zach (Brandon's other half of the Red Squadron) was rockin a new lid. Lookin' good, dewd.


The Badlands 4x4 Express looked pretty fun. In case you can't tell... all of the trucks are sparkly.


Then we found this table, and I named it "Danzig's Wet Dream." This place had the most insane and creepy knife combos I have ever seen. I'm pretty sure it was a hot spot for redneck backyard WWF wrestler wanna-bees. Note the spiked brass knuckles with knives at each end on the bottom right. A personal fave.


This one was another show-stopper. A skeleton hand attached to a massive blade with tribal patterns engraved on it. If you know Ed O'Brien, think "skeleton boardwalks."



Ah yes, the ever-popular arctic wolf painting/knife combo. The carved handle is a nice touch.



Brandon was so taken by the "Hidden Defense" yellow comb knife that he bought it. Killer bro, killer.


Every ass mannequin here was, as Beyonce would say, bootylicious.


Need a gigantic dream catcher? I know where you might be able to find one... with a wolf howling at the moon, of course.


All of you know what a stickler I am for spelling and grammar, so here are a few choice signs we ran across.


This one takes the cake because of the upside down and backwards comma next to the ampersand. Also, the attempt at spelling "batteries" is painful.


This one caught Brandon's eye... and then I told him to go*a*way.


Sad.


Sadder.


Saddest. But the drawings are pretty cool.


For some reason, I don't remember this Nintendo game... but it sure looks like fun. A video board game, that sounds like a great idea!


This poster was incredible. It was the hip-hop all stars, but looked like it was drawn by 10 different people. Can you find The Fresh Prince?


Duh. He obviously does.


Nothing weird here... just some dolls and automatic weapons. Move along, move along.


Sooooo good. A litle something for everyone.


I really wanted this hat, but wasn't sure if I am tough enough. I mean, that hat is straight up gangsta.


These were incredible. They didn't look anything like Nikes, but the fake Jordan logo is priceless.


The "Batbot Changer" reminds me of... hmm... uh... what are those called? Oh yeah, Transformers! I think Batbot Changer is a little catchier, but that's just me.


The fake Hulk Hogan wrestling toy was pretty great, too.


Look at Hulk fighting the Klan. That drawing is the spitting image of him. Go Hulk, Go!!!


Translated, it means "Soap of Saint Death." Brandon agreed that it smelled like death.


I'm guessing that if you have this license plate sign, a divorce is in your near future. So is meth and a truckstop parking lot.


Brandon wanted some new boots for clubbing, and found these sassy little toe tappers.


I don't remember the Aquarius Computer Game System, but it must have been good because the box says "A compact yet powerful system for learning computer programming, playing games, creating graphics in 16 vibrant colors & with your casette you can playback programs." Did you hear that... 16 VIBRANT COLORS!!! Maybe this is from the future.


I love the look of this old camera.


USA! USA! Not sure if you can tell, but this woman's hair would have made any country fan proud.


No need for a double-take, it says Ghanel... and it says it about 1000 times.


The coolest cover design for an atlas.


GET DOWN or LAY DOWN
For some reason, Big Bird has gone 'hood and is choking Oscar the Grouch with a gun in his face. Also, he is wearing a pair of Adidas high tops that are clipped from a photo. The best part is that the dudes in the background are clowning on Oscar. Well, that and the "L" in "Lay Down" is a gun.



Bootleg Lucha Libre masks always make me happy.


At least the human turds out here label themselves with hilarious t-shirts. And yes, he was wearing some sweet Oakleys. High five, bro.


This made me throw up a little in my mouth - clam juice, tomato juice and crappy beer all mixed together. Filthy.


The end... of our society, I mean.